Men Now Have Help To Go PEE

A friend sent this to me thanks... Phil
High tech urinal OR Damn, you're one lazy bastard

FUNNIEST STORE SLOGANS IN AMERICA!

"Found these store slogen adds and thought they were cute, read on:

*FUNERAL HOME IN NEVADA -- Drive Carefully. We'll Wait.

*AUTO DEALERSHIP IN TEXAS -- The Best Way To Get Back On Your Feet Is To Miss A Car Payment.

*GYNECOLOGIST IN NEW YORK -- Dr. Jones, At Your Cervix.

*ON AN ELECTRICIAN'S TRUCK IN MONTANA -- Let Us Remove Your Shorts.

*SACKS 4TH AVENUE IN MANHATTAN --You Could Shop Here If You Were Poor, But That Would Be Stupid.

*B.B. GUN STORE IN TEXAS --Keeping Kids Off Your Lawn For 40 Years.

*CONDOM FACTORY IN PENNSYLVANIA -- Extra long is our specialty.

*SEX THERAPIST'S OFFICE IN NEBRASKA -- Bisexuality Immediately Doubles Your Chances For A Date.

*SEX CHANGE SURGEON'S OFFICE IN ILLINOIS-- Eat, Drink and Be Mary.

*COUPLE'S THERAPIST IN NEW JERSEY --Marriage: Cures Your Fear Of Being Alone.

*LOCAL BREWERY IN GEORGIA -- Beer Is The Proof God Loves Us And Wants Us To Be Happy.

*SPORTS SHOE STORE IN MICHIGAN -- Just Buy It, You Tub Of Lard.

*PLASTIC SURGEON IN MASSACHUSETTS -- The Breast Is Yet To Come.

*ELEVATOR OPERATORS' UNION IN CHICAGO -- We Do It Going Up And Down.

*LAWYER'S OFFICE IN OREGON -- We Do It In Our Briefs!

*U.S. MINT IN WASHINGTON D.C. --Blessed Are the Young, For They Shall Inherit The National Debt.

*MANHOOD ENLARGEMENT SPECIALIST IN VIRGINIA -- We make mountains out of molehills.

*HOT CHESTNUT VENDOR IN MANHATTAN -- For toasty nuts, try us.

*VACUUM CLEANER SHOP IN VERMONT -- We Suck!

*LAWN SERVICE IN VIRGINIA -- Let Us Kiss Your Grass. "

Hope I made you smile."

Condoms And The Preacher-man

Montgomery Ala.:"Controversial preacher says teenagers will stop having illicit sex no matter how strong the temptation if parents will make sure they never leave home without one of his trademarked -What Would Jesus Do?- Condoms stashed away in their purse or wallet. WWJD condoms are a divinely inspired idea and they work like a charm, says the Rev. Dr. Paul Morehead, whose short-wave radio broadcast, reaches an estimated 16 million listeners worldwide. Don't tell me about hormones. Don't talk to me about unbridled appetites of the flesh. When a young man and a young woman give in to Satan, when they strip down like animals in the wild and prepare themselves for a lusty round of heavy petting and full-blown sex, what better reminder for them to buck up than a WWJD condom with the image of our Lord and Savior right there on the package, and then, as a fail safe measure, also on the prophylactic itself? I've tested them with my own teenagers and hardly a weekend passes when one of them doesn't come back home with a WWJD condom completely unrolled as a badge of honor. At the very moment their temptation was strongest, they turned back from sin after seeing the boldly-lettered WWJD logo that, signifies, Stop! Think! What would Jesus do in this situation? Flabbergasted critics couldn't disagree more. They say putting Jesus Christ on condoms isn't just tacky, it's a sacrilege and they openly wonder if preacher Morehead hasn't lost his mind. If you give a child a condom, you're pretty much telling him that sex is ok as long as you use protection, fumes Marcia Kenderly, a born-again Christian with 4-teenage daughters. Rev. Morehead says his own children show him their WWJD condoms as proof that even though they came close to having sex, they didn't. But how can he be sure that instead of having sex with the condom, they didn't have sex without it? I'm a married adult and I wouldn't let my husband use one of those things. I feel like I'm committing a sin just thinking about it. Naysayers aside, Morehead has arranged for a manufacturer to produce 100,000 of the WWJD prophylactics that he plans to sell for $5 a pop over the Internet and through Christian bookstores nationwide. All the profits will go to a home I'm building for unwed mothers, says the preacher. A home that wouldn't be needed if those girls had been carrying a WWJD condom...I think this man, I'm sorry..BUT has a screw loose some where! Second, I doubt any good clean Christian book store would sell condoms. Let alone these with the words, WWJD. It just tackles my brain, what people will do to make a buck."